


The 30 Minute Fic Challenge

by TheNerdRevolution



Category: A Very Potter Musical Series - Team StarKid, Greek and Roman Mythology, Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Real life - Fandom, Yu-Gi-Oh the Abridged Series, Yu-Gi-Oh!
Genre: 30 minute writing challenge, Gen, LittleKuriboh, Other
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-06-09
Updated: 2016-06-10
Packaged: 2018-07-14 02:57:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,920
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7149956
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheNerdRevolution/pseuds/TheNerdRevolution
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>So, what you have to do is write down some characters, places and scenarios with friends, then each take two characters, one place and one scenario. These are the results.</p><p>Idea taken from LittleKuriboh's Fanfiction Fridays.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. One Is Not Amused

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Written by thenerdrevolution on tumblr.
> 
> Okay, so the first pick was Draco Malfoy from Starkid's A Very Potter series, Queen Elizabeth II, in Kaiba's space elevator (lift, since I'm British) from Dark Side Of Dimensions, during a fire emergency.
> 
> Enjoy?

"Blond-haired, rich, vaguely racist, probably gay men and children first!" Draco called as he pushed his way to the front, swooshing his hair to the side with a set of long, pale fingers. He smirked at the passers-by before leaping fluidly over the barrier, without much notice from the Kaiba Corp henchmen standing guard. From the snatch of the conversation he heard, he could have sworn one of them said "Heil Kaiba!" but he was probably imagining things.

Already inside the lift, Lizzie, or Queen Elizabeth Windsor to you, was leaning against the barrier and surveying the queues below.

"They're such poor little peasants, aren't they?" she mused in a surprisingly innocent sounding voice for the words, as she heard footsteps approaching behind her.

"Quite," Draco responded. "I mean, they probably don't even know how to use the potty properly!" he declared, throwing his arm out to the side, spinning and dropping onto the floor as the doors closed behind him.

"Excuse one?" Lizzie asked. "They can't use the lavatory?"

"I doubt it," Draco huffed. "It is a very difficult skill."

A silence fell over them momentarily as the lift began to move. Draco sat on the floor, rolling a few seconds later across the lift to observe the view from the other side.

"I wonder if this goes all the way to Pigfarts," he mumbled a little while later, and Lizzie gave him a curious look.

"Pigfarts? One's never heard of such a place."

"What? But...but...Pigfarts, Pigfarts, here I come. Pigfarts, Pigfarts, yum yum yu-" He hadn't even finished his song when the white lights suddenly burned red and an alarm started blaring.

"What's going on!?" Lizzie exclaimed. "One is not amused by this turn of events!'

"I never get to finish my song," came a whine from the blond-haired diva. "Why do I never get to finish my song?" Lizzie would have responded, but suddenly a voice came over the speakers.

"The Führer would like me to announce that the lift is on fire! We know that you are technically in space where there is no oxygen, but since this is an anime universe, we would like to remind you to go fuck yourself, and to shove any complaints up your butt!"

Draco pouted and turned to the speaker. "But what if they don't fit?"

Lizzie gave a huff, too. "One never fucks oneself. One has servants to do that for her!"

Draco gave her an odd look, but didn't press the matter. He had to admit, this old woman was rather odd. Also, that tiara was very tacky.

Lizzie decided to peer out the window, and was met by nothingness. "That's curious. One doesn't see any fire."

"That'd be because it's the other side of the lift." And, sure enough, as soon as she turned around she was met with orangey flames licking up the sides of the metal.

And, eyes wide, she screamed.

"Jesus, old woman!" Draco near squealed, the effeminate tendencies of his voice getting the better of him in that moment. "I know in space no one can hear you scream, but I don't think the same logic applies to pressurised physically impossible lifts rising up to the space ship of a card-game-obsessed child billionaire with a dragon fetish!"


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Written by sarcasmwhatsarcasm on tumblr.
> 
> Okay, so the original prompt for this included a teacher from our school, who you only need to know four things about. He's old, boring, is kinda creepy and has huge eyebrows. They're really intimidating. But since no one would know who he was, we swapped him out for Yu-Gi-Oh's Ushio, since he has huge eyebrows too.
> 
> Other character is Zeus, place is Madam Puddifoot's tea shop and the situation is 'you broke into my house and now you're eating my ice cream'.

Ushio had had a hard day at that blasted school. He was supposed to be retired, for Lord’s sakes, but unfortunately the contract in which he had sold his soul to Domino High for a particularly exciting stamp didn't take pensions and retirement into account. One of those silly girls had tried to interrupt him while he was reading the Daily Mail- so very rude. He didn't care if she'd burnt her hand, it was her fault for ignoring the clearly positioned ‘hot surface’ signs above the radiator.Honestly. So as he made his way home, cycling along on his old fashioned bicycle, Ushio was hoping for a quiet night in with a relaxing crossword, a cup of tea, and his favourite Beyoncé album.

Sadly, ‘twas not to be. As he pushed open the door to the living room, Ushio was greeted by the somewhat unexpected sight of a man in his living room. More specifically, a man eating the pint of ice cream he had been saving for his birthday. This was why Ushio was a little more aggressive than he would have been otherwise.

“Would you care to explain just what you are doing in my home?” Ushio asked, fixing the man with a beady eye.

The man was tanned and dark-haired, electric blue eyes pulsing like neon lights as he looked up. Far more distracting, however, was the man’s attire- or lack of it. The man appeared to be clad in a bed sheet, draped in the style of a classic Greek dress, like those vulgar paintings in the classics department where all the models looked terribly bored. Leaning against his leg was a sparkling, very bright lightning bolt, which made Ushio suspicious. Had the calm of his life been interrupted by some drunk frat boy?

“Hera kicked me out,” said the man through a mouthful of ice cream.

Yes, apparently he had been disturbed by some drunk frat boy.

“Well, I'm terribly sorry to hear about your womanly issues, but could you console yourself elsewhere? I rather like that ice cream.”

“I'm the king of the gods, you can't tell me what to do,” the man sniffed. His regal expression was somewhat lessened by the ice cream dripping from his moustache.

“Well, me dear man, I have to inform you that I do not care. Please leave immediately.”

The man, grumbling, picked up his lightning bolt and left. Ushio watched him go, before realising that twat had taken the ice cream.

“Oi! Come back!” he yelled, but the ice cream thief was already high tailing it along the street, and Ushio’s running days were rather behind him. So he settled for some angry muttering and cursing, trotting back inside and trying to smooth his ruffled feathers.

Ushio tried, he really did, but whatever he did that evening was constantly being interrupted by the memory of that rude ice cream thief, with his despicably twinkly eyes and fabulous eyebrows- though not quite in the league of Ushio’s own. So he made up his mind that the only true cure for this annoyance was to distract himself with other people, and tea.

That was how Ushio ended up in Madam Puddifoot’s, enjoying the tastefully quaint décor as he sipped his tea. Eventually the bill needed to be paid, so he headed for the counter. On his way over, however, he accidentally bumped into one of the tables, knocking over a glass all down the front of the man who had just procured it.

“You know, if you wanted me to take my pants off, you could have just asked,” drawled the man over Ushio’s spluttering apologies. Suddenly, something clicked in the dusty recesses of his mind- the ice cream thief! He had ditched the bed sheet in favour of a rather expensive suit, which Ushio had just ruined.

“You!”

“You?”

“You stole my ice cream!”

“You're that weird eyebrows guy!”

“My eyebrows are not weird,” Ushio said affrontedly, lowering his voice at the looks directed at him from the other visitors to the tea shop.

“Lucky for you, I like weird,” leered the man, running his finger over Ushio’s left eyebrow. Ushio started at the unexpected touch and smacked his hand away.

“How dare you! I don't even know your name!”

“Zeus is the name, ruling’s the game. What do you say to letting me rule you tonight, sweetheart?”

“Oh, no. I've heard way too much from the classics department about your exploits.”

Zeus smirked and seemed rather proud of himself. “Yeah?”

Ushio glared. Zeus changed tack, sliding a well-muscled arm around his waist and whispering in his ear.

“You're not curious? I saw the furry costume in your wardrobe. Behind the suits? I can do it for real, baby. Just come try it.”

“Won't your wife kill me?”

“Nah, she only does that to the girls.” Zeus stroked along Ushio’s eyebrows again, and Ushio felt his self-control weakening.

“Perhaps a little experiment would be good.”

Zeus smirked and pulled him to the bathroom. Ushio followed, terrified of what he'd gotten himself into, and yet strangely excited.

“I do love a good pair of eyebrows,” Zeus breathed in his ear as he locked the door behind them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You may like to remember that this was actually written about our teacher.
> 
> We're traumatised.


	3. Because Politicians Belong in the Shadow Realm

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Written by why-twerk-we-could-be-gaming on tumblr.
> 
> Next prompt was Marik Ishtar (the YGOTAS variety), David Cameron, prime minister of the U.K., the place was the Shadow Realm and the prompt was 'I can hear you playing Mario Kart.' Or something similar. I can't exactly remember.

Marik groaned as he managed to weave his way out of the crows of screaming civilians. Honestly by now you'd have thought that they'd be used to the constant sing-song warbling of the kuribohs that sometimes seemed to feel like the only intelligent beings currently inhabiting the dumb, cloudy, purple mess that most people liked to call ‘The Shadow Realm.’ The reason for Marik’s early morning mission, or was it morning, time seemed almost non-existent in this place, quite like Bakura’s ability to actively do something to get revenge on the Pharaoh any time that wasn't somewhere in the distant future…wait, what was he doing again? Marik paused for a moment, attempting to recollect what he'd been doing before he'd distracted himself. Frowning, he closed his eyes and thought for a moment, attempting to block out the annoying Yoshi sounds that threatened to turn him just as insane as Melvin was. Marik’s eyes snapped open as he once again focuses on the irritatingly repetitive sound of some twat playing Mario Kart. Marik once again strode towards the source of the noise, stopping just short of a door covered in pictures of weird old white men with various graffiti covering their faces and a singular aesthetically framed picture of a pig above a sign instructing all ‘smelly peasants’ to go ‘throw themselves in the nearest recycling waste bin.’ After taking a moment to wonder what kind of pompous crotch jockey would even own a door in this place, Marik shoved the door in and was about to tear this prick a new EFF-hole before spotting the naked figure of none other than the fucking Prime Minister.

“Oh, right, yeah, everything makes sense now,” Marik interjected before David even had the to pause his game and open his mouth. Watching the frozen glare of Luigi as he was about to throw a red shell at the dumb Yoshi that Marik assumed was David’s character, Marik carefully and silently began removing his shoe, not bothering to question how he'd managed to gain a TV, let alone Mario Kart as, let’s be honest, he was a fucking Oxbridge Tory. Mr Cameron looked up and attempted to look for some kind of security to throw out this strange foreign guy who'd just shown up in the odd corner of this strange place that he'd decided to claim as his room. Opening his mouth to question the person, David suddenly felt a hard impact to his face and felt the sensation of blood flowing out of his nose begin. Looking down to find a stray boot fall at his feet with a freshly red stain adorning the sole, he began to raise his he'd only to find the Egyptian stranger now standing directly in front of him.

“Shut the frig up and turn the frigging sound on your game down!”

The person snatched his boot up and began hobbling out of the room before yelling out into the lingering darkness.

“Hey, Bakura! You'll never guess who I just assaulted!”


End file.
